Trader Joe’s Pizza Bread Cheese is a new obsession of mine.
Its melty consistency, herby flavor, and no-fuss preparation keep me up late at night when my eyes are bloodshot and I most desire licentious snack foods. Based on its blocky appearance and texture, I thought it was simply going to be a sturdy Indian paneer cheese, but, boy, I was wrong. Trader Joe’s Pizza Bread Cheese achieves a whole new texture once you microwave it.
Once you nuke it, this turns into squishy, melty, mozzarella-like cheese. The consistency is incredibly pleasant; it’s got that squeaky-cheese-curd thing going on, and the flavor is very much like the top of a New York-style pizza. It also plays great with sauce. I ate it dunked in ranch, and it just made this cheese sing even more. Think of it like eating the inside of a mozzarella stick without the breading. Some good jarred marinara would be excellent on the side, too. Or spring for some tangy and sweet TJ’s Incredisauce. With a little dressing up, this cheese would make a great appetizer for friends at a party. Or, sans fuss, this is excellent stoner food. I’m super into it and all of its possibilities. Who doesn’t like warm, melty cheese? Aliens. Quakers. Those who hate pleasure. That’s who. I will happily microwave this and eat an entire package of it at 3 a.m.
Danny is a comedian, cook, and food writer living in Los Angeles. He loves gas station eggs, canned sardines, and Easter candy. He also passionately believes that all the best chips come from Pennsylvania (Herr's!). If you can't understand Danny when he talks, it's because he's from Pittsburgh.
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!
The best device for bread cheese is the waffle iron.