Releasing a veggie and cheese dish during the holidays is a power move from Trader Joe’s. They’re trying to corner the market on ready-to-heat, ready-to-eat dishes that you can easily serve your friends and family. I respect the venture. What I simply cannot respect, however, is the description of Trader Joe’s Cheesy Creamy Greens & Veggies on the store’s site. It’s…a lot: “’Can you please put the cheese back and get some greens instead?’ asks the veggie lover of the veggie skeptic as they peruse their neighborhood Trader Joe’s. ‘If loving cheese is wrong, I don’t want to be right!’ the skeptic cries, appalled by such a demand. Suddenly, out of the corners of their eyes, they see it: Cheesy Creamy Greens & Veggies. They share a glance. They smile. They realize this rich, Veggie-laden delight is the culinary peacemaker of their dreams.” Someone is taking cues from back issues of the J. Peterman catalog.
TJ’s cheesy greens are an experience from start to finish. A good experience? Definitely not. They come out of the bag looking like little frozen green turds. And honeslty, it doesn’t get any better when it cooks up. It’s like the Erewhon version of slop; just a textureless amalgamation of all the ingredients. You can taste something different in each bite but you can never really tell what it is. I get that they were going for creamy, but there is such a thing as too creamy. Even the mixture of cheeses—provolone and mozzarella—doesn’t really improve things.
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!